Shaun White falls to Earth at Sochi Olympics — Literally!

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Posted February 13, 2014 by admin in Vaporizer Blog

It was a sad day for the world’s most stereotypically stoner sport. That’s right, America. Shaun White has caught the Sampson syndrome. After famously shearing his iconic ginger ‘fro, the world’s most decorated snowboarder was put to the test by Iouri Podladtchikov in the half-pipe. We at Vaporizer-Review were just as shocked as the rest of the country to see our figurehead fail to medal in an event we have become accustomed to watching him dominate.

White was attempting to become the seventh person to win three consecutive gold medals in a single event at the Winter Games, but, much like Michael Phelps in London two years ago, the once-invincible White was dethroned on Tuesday night for the entire world to see. The upstart Podladtchikov, a Russian-born boarder competing for Switzerland whom the world now knows as “I-Pod,” concocted a signature trick known as the “Yolo,” an invention that ended up being White’s downfall. The trick, which stands for the popular abbreviation for “You Only Live Once,” involves a lateral rotation of 1440 degrees: two complete flips plus two complete 360-degree turns. Pretty epic and innovative stuff from a new international superstar.

Despite landing the trick in qualifying events prior to the Sochi Games, White failed to complete the complex trick in his first attempt, landing hard on his ass. His second run included another attempt which ended in another awkward fall and an attempt at a double-corkscrew that was probably more painful to watch than actually experience. Those miscues not only knocked White from gold medal contention; it eliminated him from the medal stand entirely, leaving White with a score of 90.25 and a fourth-place finish.

Just like with Phelps two years ago, another Olympic torch has been passed to a younger generation.


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One Comment


  1.  
    Zurich

    Barely watched any Olympics at all this year, usually I get down on some curling and bob sled. I also like the downhill skiing long jump or whatever it is called. That stuff is crazy. As far as Shaun White is concerned I could care less. Never really liked him the first place and it is about time he disappears from the news.





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